The “Super Power” excuse me “SUPER POWER” Forever Flashlight is neither SUPERLY-POWERED nor will it “forever” be in my house nor is it a “flashlight” unless by “flashlight” you mean “brief flash of light.”

You have to shake it to activate it but I shook (literally) 10 cans of spray paint recently, so my skills in this area are finely honed.

Yeah, I shook it alright, ’cause I wanted to see if “1 minute will give up to 30 minutes continuous bright light” like the package said.

It claims its light is visible for up to a 1mile, but I could hardly see it 4 feet away. The first 5 seconds after shaking definitely provided the best light. Here’s an example of what I mean:

What? You can’t see it? Did you click on the photo to enlarge it and look in the red circle I drew to help you? Are you sure? ‘Cause it’s there. I took 5 shots and this is the best one.

I also bought this “Super Power LED Light” because of the LED light (bright, long-lasting), it doesn’t need batteries, and it’s supposedly waterproof, but if the light doesn’t come on, none of those cool features really matters now, do they?

I guess I could test its waterproof capabilities, but given that all its features have so far only been failures I’m just not going to set myself up for more disappointment. Well, plus if it doesn’t light up how can you test that it lights up under water?

Now there are a few advertised features that have proven accurate: it’s lightweight, it doesn’t require batteries, and the light appeared to be LED.

Usually I’m happy with what I get on but I am so not impressed with this product that I am sending it back. <ed. note – I waited too long to send it back so it’s in the Goodwill pile in case someone else wants to try.>

This is the second time — and the last time — I’ve bought into the whole “shake it” or “crank it” and it will <turn on radio/ flashlight/siren/ bring world peace> concept.

Fool me once, that’s bad. Fool me twice, I get mad. Aggravatingly it always seems to take me twice before I really learn it.