This has got to be one of the best gifts ever. I got it from 2 of my sisters, who made them.


As my sister told me before I opened it, “cash is king right now” so they gave me 23 boxes made with a dollar bill top and a dollar bill bottom (23 x 2 = 46 = my age).

Then each of the boxes had 2 pennies in it (again 23 x 2=46 = my age).

Anyhoo, not only is it the coolest, most creative idea, but the execution is fabulous! Did you see how the “ONE” is centered on each box? And the boxes actually open and close easily. Definitely zoom (click on) this photo because I couldn’t edit it due to operator error:


And oh my lord the effort it took.  Even though I’m the one who says she “puts the anal back into analyst” I wouldn’t have the patience to fold and piece those all together.

I’d start smoking again or just throw a rubber band around the bunch and say “Here. Deal. It’s the thought that counts.” So you will not likely receive a gift like this from me.

The best part of this gift is all of the effort and care that went into it, of course. I don’t want to take them apart!!


Side note: Sorry for the crappy-as@ out of focus photos. I used my cell phone camera.

Consumer tip: If you care about pix, either make sure your cell phone’s camera has auto-focus or kwitcherbellyakin’, don’t be so GD lazy and just get out your real camera…


Unless you’re a sociopath you probably have something you regret. I only have a few regrets so far, so I guess that’s good (or else I’m a sociopath).

My “regrets” are usually along the line of “I regret I had to experience that pain” or “I regret I didn’t learn this lesson the last time I thought I learned it.” Those aren’t really regrets, though.

Those are more like “This really sucks and I wish I didn’t have to go through it” events, but that doesn’t mean I’ve regretted the experience that led to the “this really sucks” moment. Actually, sometimes what leads to the “this really sucks” moment isn’t even within your control anyway, like when someone dies.

ANYWAY, my point wasn’t to discuss regrets. In fact, my point is to talk about non-regrets.

Can I be both shallow and deep for a few minutes? Sure, I could continue discussing my weighty topics of late (IHopeYouGetAKidneyStone…) but I am nothing if not versatile, so now I want to discuss a couple of personal non-regrets.

One non-regret was borrowing money to redo my kitchen. How many people have you heard say they “wish they had done it sooner” <whatever “it” is>? By that time, they’re usually moving or dying.

Of course, when you have gold & white tile, paneling, and pink and gray laminate flooring, one could argue I had to do it. Someday “when I have time” (HA!) I’ll dig up an old pre-hab photo and scan it, but just hearing the colors oughta give you a clue…

Now I have a dishwasher-ette, nice cabinets, more storage, a tilt-out sponge holder (little things matter in a small space) and (my favorite) a set of drawers with a hidden pull-out cutting board. And I love my rounded counter corners. They’ve saved me many bruises, pokes and curses.



The only 1/2-way decent photo I could find without a lot of work


Another non-regret is buying my diamond ring. I started saving for it because 1. I love diamonds 2. I was having major crisis at the prospect of turning 40 and decided this might help me get through it easier (yeah I know, drowning my sorrows in material goods, but what can I say? I think the process of getting it helped). 3. I wasn’t sure I was gonna get a diamond ring the “usual” way (good thing I didn’t wait for THAT to happen!) and 4. I derived so much pleasure from my kitchen that I was glad I didn’t wait for the “right time” to do it.

My “OMG* I’m Turning 40” crisis actually began about 2 1/2 years before I turned 40. It literally ended the morning of my 40th birthday. Which was on a beach in Mexico, so I guess it’s hard to feel bad in that situation anyway, but the crisis was just over.

I can’t really explain why the crisis occurred and why its conclusion was so anti-climactic, but I got through it. I also got a diamond ring and a brief thing with a jeweler I met while shopping doing research.

Brief aside: I have to claim inventing the whole “right hand diamond ring” thing. They started marketing it about a year after I bought my ring, which I wear on my right hand, but there was nobody doing it until then. I guess that’s a regret—that I didn’t trademark or patent that idea.

And it’s not like I love diamonds so much that I keep buying them. I haven’t gotten a necklace or earrings because I wouldn’t be able to see them, and I like to see my diamonds sparkle.

Sometimes I feel shallow for enjoying this “thing” so much, when (other than my gadget-coveting-though-usually-not-buying) I try to follow the William Morris tenet about having only things that are useful or beautiful.

What can I say? I don’t regret it and still derive great pleasure when I see it sparkle in the sunlight on my stubby finger. It was money well-spent.

*Omar, Sarah: “Oh My God”



robo.jpgOh why wasn’t this available when I was a kid? 

For those who don’t remember, this is the coveted Lost in Space robot. The one that says all those memorable phrases like “Danger Will Robinson,” “That does not compute.” The repro’d. one has an additional 509 phrases by the ORIGINAL voice of the robot from the tv series.

Oh! And did I mention that it has the rotating torso, flashing lists in the head, and the claw hands?!?

But wait—there’s more! For those of you looking for your “brush with greatness” moment, MY childhood best friend’s dad knew the robot voice guy. Idon’t know if that’s true or not, but I believed it then. I will be looking for a reality check on this fact from my childhood friend and her family, who I will email separately because I don’t think they really read this.

Now, here’s the kind of down side to this eagerly-anticipated-highly-sought-after-potential-Xmas gift: it costs 24,500 dolla… Yeah, I know—seriously—sigh. Of course that comes with a dedicated help line, but still…

Yet, I will ask for it for my 45th bday in Feb., because as my friend Ann (who also doesn’t read this blog) says, “Go big or go home.”**



**I think it’s really out of a movie but she’s the one who always says it.

Today’s dead animal of the day is a beheaded mole/vole on the back porch. (I don’t think it has a head anyway). I HATE getting rid of these things of course (like anyone would like getting rid of 1/2-eaten animal bits?!).

The real a**-froster of all of this is that I’ve had my neighbor over, my dad, one sister, 3 window installation people <on 2 different days>, and the guy that cuts my lawn, and I have not asked ANY of them to remove it for me.

And even though GN, the dead animal whisperer, gave me a birthday cuepon* for “1 dead animal removal,” I’ve already told her there’s no way I’m cashing it in.

She spent 6+ hours on my *&^%’ing wireless connection and is always helping me with one thing or another. Nor will I ask my dad, who’s spent at least that long on my network connection, and who walks my dog as faithfully as my mail carrier delivers mail.

Instead, I’m sucking it up and ignoring it until I’m damn good and ready. And believe me, I’ve had corpses have remained in situ until they crumble into ashes. Although I just remembered I was going to clean the porch this w/end.

So I guess I can’t avoid it much longer. Plus, I really don’t want to step on another little mole/vole corpse–the last time almost became therapy issue #764,321.

*As you may be aware, I’m on a personal crusade to rid the world of pronouncing “coupon” <from the French “couper”, to cut> as “cuepon.” For my birthday my sister, a fellow crusader, gave me a box labeled “CUE-pon-o-rama” with coupons ranging from “laptop wireless setup” to “grocery shopping” to “Ted Drewes run.”